Scary Honesty – Or the Truth Shall Set You Free!


John 8:31,32


31 So Jesus was saying to those Jews who had believed Him, “If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine; 32 and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.”


How often do we let our fear of the perceived outcome stop us from being honest about what we are feeling and needing? Can you remember being taught how to respond, “Say you are sorry,” “Say thank you.” “Shake hands and quit arguing.” How many times have we been in a situation where we did not communicate what we were feeling or needing, but rather went along with the crowd? How often have we not been honest because we were afraid of the outcome if we were honest? How often – weekly, daily, by the minute. In this passage Jesus communicates how to be free – by the truth we are free.


One of the first stories I read about Marshall Rosenberg was a story when he received a large check from someone who said he should use it to buy something the donor had in mind. Marshall looked at the check and then handed it back to the donor and said he could not accept it for the item the donor wanted it to go for. He was honest with the donor and met his need for integrity. There was a chance his honesty could have cost him a lot of money from this donor. The donor asked him what he would want to use the money for and he gave another item that he thought he needed more for his work in NVC. Hearing what Marshal said the donor gave the check back to Marshall and said he should use it for the item he mentioned.


Silly example I know but it carries with it the same understanding that Jesus was talking about. Be who you are, state what you are feeling and needing and be free with your interaction with others and you will be free! Marshall goes on to call this “Scary Honesty” because it may stimulate fear or other emotions in others when one does not act the way they have been “taught” to act.


Compassionate Translation


“So Jesus gave clarification to those who had an interest in what he was saying. “I want to contribute to you, would you like some input? If you practice connecting with yourself, being in the presence of the Divine, then you will know what you are feeling and needing. Don’t give that away! For a true connection you have to be honest, honesty is as important as empathy. Don’t let fear stand in the way of connection. Communicate your feelings and needs, connect with the Divine and know, you are responsible for what you say and do but others are responsible for what they hear and how they respond. This is the truth – a freeing truth.”


Joy to You!




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